Just....

Hi, mikorin here.

So what and where should I write this time? Lately and these past few months, life has pull that motherfuvking joke on you card. To the point that makes me wonder, where did I do wrong? What did I do that makes my life is so fuvking miserable? My whole life felt like a punishment. Is this a punishment for me? 

But seriously speaking, it just getting worse day by day. Poverty, anxiety, sadness, depression, stress, it's all in me right now. I'm sick of  it. I'm tired of it. I'm not gonna said I'll end my life coz IT'S TOTALLY NOT WORTH IT COZ I KNOW I WILL ROTTING IN HELL IF I DO KILL MYSELF.

So 'kill myself' is totally not an option. It's a no no. (Even sometimes I DO have that thought came across my mind. ugh I feel so sinful.)

So what should I do? Even if I want to find solution, even if I want to let it all out, even I want to destressed it, I CAN'T do that. Why? because I'm so fuvking poor that if I want to do things I want, I can't and that's making me feel much worse. How should I solve this? How should I solve this? How should I handle this?

Human is a bunch of fakers, and some people still encourage me to have hope for human but sorry. I had already lost the hope for humanity way too long ago. It's just me here. And you know how human works? There's only two group exist - the manipulator, and the manipulated. And I choose to be the manipulator. But not now. (maybe) Bit by bit I tried to manipulated people around me. Maybe they don't notice this but one day, I'll create a big name on my own and that time, I'll be the greatest manipulator. (Evil laugh)

You asking me why? Well I just feel like it. Just wait when I have money, I'm so damn rich and powerful that human will come at my feet. Why? huh hv you ever feel so powerless and poor that you don't even dare to put your head up? Have you ever come across one state in life that you need to choose between food or living? Well yeah I am in that state. But hold my words. I'm gonna change that. One day, I'll be rich, making a lot of money, become famous and I want to show to that motherfucker who's the loser one here. Yeah one day, I'll show them who I really am. The one they make fun of, the one they make a joke of, the one they be friends out of sympathy - is the one that on top of them. They should be scared of me right?

Oh talking about scared. I highkey find it's enticing and fun when I know people is scared of me. Wow that's powerful. So with that in mind, I'll work hard and become powerful and makes people scare to mess up with me. Ugh how I wish I had been a genius. Be genius is one of the element to be powerful. Well of course because no one will ever put you down when you're so damn genius and knowledgeable.

Oh how much I want to say these words on their face. 

- Shame/joke on you baby

- Who's the loser here?

- Go back and look in the mirror before coming at me.

I wish that time will come. When that times come, I'll make my family the most respectable and powerful family. Do you know how much those motherfuckers messing and humiliated my family? Fuvk you society. I don't care if they humiliated me right now but they humiliated my family, making us looks like the most poor, the despicable family ever. Oh fuvk that. Those shithead don't even know what is poverty. Born with silver spoon, living a good life makes them  know nothing about how real world works. This sucks. I'm not psycho enough to make those shithead disappeared from this world but I lowkey (highkey tbh) wish their life one day will hits rocks bottom and feel what is poverty, poor, humiliated mean is. (Am I wrong to wish for that??)

"Do good and people will do good for you." Huh this statement is the real joke here. This statement is a TOTAL BULLSHIT. But yeah. There's some dimwit who still believe in that. Huh funny. That statement does not applied anymore in this world tho. Because of what? Because human is evil. Demon disguise in human.

DEMON

So yeah. The conclusion here is, I will become powerful, unbeatable and I'll end this shitty era of my life. Wait for me mutherfuvker. I'll come like a hungry wolf coming for it's food coz in this food chain, I'm aiming to be the predator. 

Just wait. I'll come for you baby. Just watch your back....